Compliments & How I Respond to Them

I found it interesting that there are different ways of responding to compliments and that I've been doing them unconsciously. I didn't know that my responses could convey different feels to different groups of people.

I've tried to analyse my responses to compliments and the reasons I do them.

Let me show you.



*Accepting
I've been working hard on my presentation and I am complimented by a friend on it to which I reply "Thanks".

*Accepting, taken to another level, with shamelessness
I've just got my hair cut, and a close friend tells me that I look good to which I reply "You know I always look good with ANY hair, hahahahaha".

In the case of accepting, I do it mostly when I'm being complimented on something which I think I deserve to be praised for. Call it meritocracy.
I can get big-headed over some compliments to the point of being shameless when it comes to something which boosts my ego. However, this response is limited to those who are close to me.



*Deflecting
I'm complimented by a friend on my high score on a quiz to which I reply "Ok la, the lecturer was quite lenient".

Compliments which I deflect the most are festive-seasons kind of compliments (one auntie always tells me every CNY, "Wah, so smart ah, studying in NUS."), or those who are superior to me in some settings (eg. a supervisor during internship). I guess the reason I deflect compliments is because I find them "ingratiating".
Yes, the compliments do hold some truth, yet I find it better to remain modest; I deflect.



*Rejecting
Well, when someone sincerely gives a compliment, something is surely worth being complimented on. When you reject a compliment, don't you think it's like saying the complimentor has told you a lie?



*Returning
Sure, the most politically-correct way of responding to a compliment is to return one. But I don't see the point of doing it for the sake of being polite, which might be the case most of the time. If I find I can't compliment my complimentor on anything, I'd just keep my mouth shut. It's better than telling a lie.



*Thanking and denigrating
I don't think I do this one. Once I accept a compliment, I acknowledge it; there's no need to downplay it.



Maybe my choice of responses was automatic, depending on how I felt about the whole setting. However, now that I'm more aware of various responses to compliments, I'll sure make a conscious effort to respond to compliments in the most appropriate way.